Today’s Toons 6/6/16

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In Case You Missed It Dept.:

Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump planned to debate to raise ten million dollars for women’s health care. They disagreed on disbursement. Sanders wanted the money to go to cancer screenings and pre natal care while Trump wanted the money to go to breast implants for women who are an eight or less.

President Obama met with the Group of Seven Industrial leaders in Japan on Thursday where the G-7 leaders discussed trade. Hillary Clinton favors free trade, Donald Trump favors free trade with equally developed nations, and when Bernie Sanders was told about the G-7, he shouted Bingo!

President Obama placed a wreath at Hiroshima to mark Harry Truman’s dropping the atomic bomb on Japan. The two presidents share a connection. Harry Truman was the only president ever to drop the atomic bomb while President Obama is the only president to do mushrooms in high school.

President Obama laid a wreath at Hiroshima Friday. No mention was made that Japan started the war with a sneak attack on Pearl Harbor following the rape of Korea, Manchuria and China. It just proves if you make a quality automobile, it goes a long way toward making up for past war crimes.

President Obama’s speech at Hiroshima did not mention the million lives that were saved by Truman’s decision to drop the atomic bomb. It also gave him a safe place to grow up in Hawaii. The only Zeroes that have attacked President Obama are the dozen or so in the federal budget deficit.

Alabama, Florida State and LSU recruited the top three football classes of incoming freshmen players in Friday’s poll. This is a list that all the top schools want to be on. Donald Trump’s one big disappointment is that his candidacy has not helped to recruit athletes to play at Trump University.

President Obama laid a wreath and gave a speech honoring America’s war dead on Memorial Day at Arlington Cemetery Monday just three days after he’d laid a wreath honoring Japan’s war dead. The nation could only listen somberly. It was another painful reminder that he’s still president.

The National Review reports top Democrats are willing to push a Joe Biden-Elizabeth Warren ticket if Hillary implodes. There’s baggage there, too. The latest poll shows more Americans are offended by Elizabeth Warren for claiming to be a Redskin than they are by the Washington Redskins.

The Cincinnati Zoo had to shoot and kill a gorilla to protect a child Saturday. It’s a campaign issue now. Hillary promised better jobs for gorillas, Trump vowed to build a new enclosure and make Mexico pay for it, and Bernie applauded the idea of shooting the powerful to protect the weak.

Donald Trump clinched the GOP nomination for president and set a record for most number of primary votes ever received by a GOP candidate in U.S. election history. Trump’s only platform is a boast that he alone will make America great again. Mitt Romney just enrolled at Trump University.

Donald Trump railed at reporters Tuesday who questioned him about Trump University and the lawsuits brought by former students against the online college. It has a boiler room feel. When you graduate from Trump University with honors, it means your tuition check didn’t bounce.

Hillary Clinton blasted Donald Trump as a con man after lawsuit documents against Trump University were unsealed. Hold on. Say what you will about a degree from Trump University, it may be worthless but it still has more value in today’s job market than a degree in English Literature.

California Governor Jerry Brown set aside his long feud with Bill Clinton Tuesday and agreed to endorse Hillary for president. Twenty-four years ago during the Democratic debates, Jerry called Bill the Prince of Sleaze. It was a major breach of royal protocol, you never refer to a king as a prince.

New York Mayor Bill DeBlasio was slammed for the increase in crime Tuesday after he ended the NYPD’s power to stop and frisk. The city is beset by quality of life problems. New York subway riders complain it costs so much to ride the subway that at these prices it’s cheaper to urinate at home.

— Argus Hamilton

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