This Thread Brought To You By The Letter C:
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
Recently-discovered emails show that, while Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton was fed “Meet the Press” questions in advance. It’s only fair. I mean, who really knows their favorite color right off the top of their head?
The EPA botched the cleanup on an abandoned mine and let a million gallons of contaminated water flow into Colorado’s San Juan River. But don’t worry, their coal-fired plant regulations won’t have any unintended consequences.
After his stage was overrun by protesters, Bernie Sanders left a Seattle campaign stop without regaining the stage. Ah… looks like he’s using Obama’s Iraq strategy.
A new report shows that the Chinese have been reading the emails of “many” top Obama administration officials since 2010. I wish Congressional investigators could say that.
A new report shows that the government is failing to fully screen Obamacare applicants. To fix the problem, the government is now having all applicants remove their belt and shoes.
President Obama once again derided the idea of voter ID, saying “going to vote in somebody else’s name doesn’t happen”. Yes, where he comes from in Chicago, it’s usually several somebodies’ names.
President Obama said that Iran’s Supreme Leader “is a politician just like everybody else”. Uh huh. And Germany’s concentration camps were just a housing program.
According to a senior House leader, the White House is blocking the release of a report on Russia’s violation of a Nuclear Forces Treaty. Oh… so THAT’S the post-election flexibility Obama was talking about.
A trendy bar in London is intoxicating customers by pumping alcohol vapor into the air. The pump is on loan from the Democrats who drafted Obamacare.
— Fred Thompson
President Obama compared GOP lawmakers to Iran hardliners who chant for death to America Wednesday. He’s still willing to bargain with Republicans. With a showdown looming with Congress over budget cuts President Obama just offered to cut three programs, Hannity, Limbaugh and O’Reilly.
Donald Trump fired a campaign advisor Tuesday when the New York Post uncovered some past racist language the advisor had used about black people and posted on Facebook. When Americans heard the news they were astonished. No one had any idea that Donald Trump has a campaign advisor.
Fox News boasted twenty-six million viewers in the prime time GOP debate Thursday and seven million viewers in the earlier debate. The moderators added much to the plot. On Monday, Donald Trump described Megyn Kelly as a bimbo, so it’s only a matter of time before he asks her to marry him.
Donald Trump admitted in the GOP debate he participated in wielding money to gain influence, power and favors in Washington D.C. He said the reason that Hillary Clinton attended his wedding was that he gave her money. Coincidentally that was the same reason Mrs. Trump attended the wedding.
Joe Biden was mum Tuesday on whether he will announce he’s running for president, however his friends and family report that Joe’s been acting more and more presidential lately. Just last week, he made a secret diplomatic trip to Mexico. Unfortunately he was headed for Canada at the time.
Donald Trump denied that his reference to blood coming out of Megyn Kelly during the GOP debate had anything to do with her menstrual cycle but referred to her attitude. President Obama said if you like Donald Trump’s hormonal denial, you can believe Donald Trump’s hormonal denial. Period.
Hillary Clinton agreed to turn over her e-mail server to the Justice Department Tuesday. It had top secret classified information on it but there was no evidence she used encryption. Hillary could be the first member of the Clinton family in history to be impeached before the New Hampshire primary.
Vermont socialist Bernie Sanders went roaring past Hillary Clinton in New Hampshire Tuesday as Donald Trump led the GOP field. Our next president could be Bernie Sanders or Donald Trump. Americans are just starting to realize we had it much better when we were ruled by a mad English king.
Hillary Clinton gave her Chappaqua home server to the FBI amid reports there is secret intelligence on it. We all know what’s next. Forget the secret intelligence, once the FBI releases Bill Clinton’s browser history over the last ten years, the sympathy backlash will sweep Hillary into the White House.
The Barack Obama Foundation elected three board members Thursday who will help raise five hundred million dollars to build the Obama presidential Library at the University of Chicago campus. He was a law lecturer there for twelve years. He taught the How to Avoid the Constitutional Law course.
Senator Chuck Schumer was hailed as a hero in New York for refusing to back the Iran nuclear deal this week but he was treated as a turncoat by the White House. Chuck tried to be the best Democrat he could be in announcing his opposition. He discovered dangerous levels of lead in the Middle East plan.
The Justice Department was reported Monday exploring legal ways to revoke the travel visas of U.S. citizens who are fighting for ISIS in Iraq and Syria. It’s the best way to keep these terrorists from re-entering the United States. They’re too arrogant to go to Mexico and wait their turn at the truck stop.
— Argus Hamilton
A PAC supporting Hillary Clinton just received an anonymous donation of $1 million. Which means that if she wins any of us can say that it was us that gave her the million bucks and hit her up for a favor.
Bernie Sanders is polling at 44 percent among Democrats in New Hampshire and has passed Hillary Clinton as the Democratic front-runner. And in another new poll, zero percent of Hillary’s staffers wanted to be the one to bring her that news.
Things might be slowing down a bit for Donald Trump. He recently dropped nine points in some of the latest polls. When he heard that, Trump said, “Oh no. Was it everything I said?”
— Jimmy Fallon
Donald Trump said in a new interview that he believes his performance in the polls shows that he has not crossed the line of appropriateness. You can read the entire interview in this month’s issue of Juggs magazine.
Donald Trump gave a speech yesterday where he accused Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton of being under the control of lobbyists, special interests, and deep-pocketed donors. Trump says we should vote for him because he’s not under control at all.
— Seth Meyers
Bernie Sanders is now leading Hillary Clinton in New Hampshire. He’s seven points ahead. So forget those emails from when she was secretary of state. I want to see the emails Hillary sent out this morning.