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In Case You Missed It Dept.:
CNN’s Anderson Cooper compared the CIA’s enhanced interrogation of al-Qaeda terror suspects to tactics used by the Nazis. He forgets how people and standards change over the years. Rectal hydration may have been a form of torture a dozen years ago but today it’s covered under Obamacare.
San Francisco was a mess Friday after the tropical storm dumped four inches of rain on the Bay Area, triggering flooding, mudslides and blackouts. Local newscasters say there are two hundred thousand people who are currently without any power in San Francisco. They’re known as Republicans.
Senator Harry Reid said Friday that Democrats never recovered from the Obamacare rollout. Senate Democrats Tom Harkin and Chuck Schumer also blasted Obamacare. The most successful operation made possible by Obamacare so far is the one where you have your committee chairmanship removed.
The Department of Health and Human Services reported Medicare last year overpaid sixty-four million dollars for erection pumps that the government provides for senior male Medicare recipients. The White House pointed out that this was not a feature of Obamacare. It’s Clintoncare if it’s anything.
Senator Elizabeth Warren emerged as a leftist hero Friday when she ripped the White House for rolling back Wall Street reform in the budget bill. She’s one to watch. Her claim of Native American blood is highly disputed, but she might run for president under her Indian name, Dances with Marxism.
Dick Cheney went on Meet the Press with Chuck Todd Sunday and defended the CIA’s enhanced interrogation techniques. The former vice president doesn’t just talk the talk, he walks the walk. Just last weekend in Las Vegas, Dick Cheney went backstage at the Rio after the show and got Teller to talk.
Congress passed a budget and decided not to shut down the government Friday. They have car payments to make, and these guys can’t exist in the nation’s capital without a car. Congressmen must drive their own cars because cab drivers refuse to pick up people who are statistically likely to rob them.
President Obama’s executive order granting blanket amnesty to illegal aliens was struck down in a Pennsylvania federal court Tuesday as unconstitutional. The president didn’t skip a beat correcting the misunderstanding. He quickly declared another executive order making it constitutional.
CIA psychologist Jim Mitchell went on Fox News and revealed how he interrogated Khalid Sheik Mohammed to discover Osama bin Laden’s hideout. There’s evidence that detainees at Guantanamo prison are still being tortured. They are constantly being forced to eat Michelle Obama’s school lunches.
— Argus Hamilton
Golden Globe nominations were announced, but some people are upset that “The Walking Dead” and “Modern Family” were snubbed. It’s OK. President Obama has issued an executive action granting them all a path to a nomination.
President Obama recently said that his day is all about politics, so in the mornings he likes to watch ESPN. So if you get the feeling he’s repeating himself every half hour, that’s where he learned it from.
In an interview, President Obama said he recently deejayed a small dance party at the White House. Obama has a lot in common with deejays. He takes requests and then completely ignores them.
— Jimmy Fallon
“Star Wars: Episode VII” comes out exactly one year from today — as long as we don’t get threats from Darth Vader.
— Jimmy Kimmel
“Now let me see if I have this right. The family situation is so unstable, ‘Junior’ doesn’t even know where to send a Father’s Day card. There’s no guidance or discipline in the home. Junior gets dumped into the education system where he is socially promoted because the overwhelmed school district can’t deal with the undisciplined whelp. Junior’s major formative influences are ‘gangsta’ rap videos and a corresponding peer group of gangsta wannabes.
At age 18, Junior is turned loose on society carrying a bad attitude, a broken compass and little respect for authority. Junior gets himself in big trouble with the law and meets dire consequences.
Then, the situational diagnosis is that the police need more training and understanding?
Pardon me for asking, but do you really believe that bullshit?”